I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize