Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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