maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
