seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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