woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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