I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize