I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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