Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
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