That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
