if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
