somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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