Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
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I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
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