I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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