Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
