I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize