New low: just hacked my moms facebook
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
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