We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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