Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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