the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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