We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Randomize
