I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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