So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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