bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It's like God shit irony all over that family
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
