I think I am morally bankrupt
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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