Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
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