when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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