talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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