Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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