just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
