So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I'm passing your future prison.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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