so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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