why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
