So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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