I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
And then my night got REAL pukey
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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