I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
My pussy is not your playground.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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