singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
