your parents love me but you hate me
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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