best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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