I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
