I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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