no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
