Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
