You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
