I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
