Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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