You really coming over, don't trick.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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