Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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