I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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