ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
