im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
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We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
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