he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
