Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
